Slammertime … You Can’t Snort This!

First, my apologies to MC Hammer for the title of this post. I just couldn’t help myself.
If you haven’t heard, Lindsay Lohan is back in jail … oh, what a surprise. Is there any wonder that she is #1 with a bullet atop my Death Pool list? As if jettisoning yet another chance for this self-destructive Hollywood refuse to clean up her act wasn’t enough to raise your ire, we had to hear the pathetic pleas of her spotlight grabbing father as she was being whisked off, once again, to the clink, “She doesn’t need jail time, she needs rehab!”.
Really?!? You mean the rehab she’s continually walked out on, not even spending enough time there to unpack her bags? You mean the rehab she should have been going to the last few months since her last appearance in bright orange State-supplied clothing? You mean the rehab that most drug addicts in this country can’t afford or aren’t even given the chance to attend instead of multi-year pokie sentences?
This is a tragedy in the making that would be comical if it wasn’t so sad. A beautiful, talented, successful young starlet who continually tosses her blessings in the dumpster like they were last week’s Penny Saver. Worse yet, her public defense seems to be headed by an absentee Dad who has decided to show up now that the media circus is in town for the newest episode in this disaster reality show.
If you really wanted to help this girl, you’d sign her into a real high-security rehab unit. One she couldn’t walk out of, of her own volition, for a minimum of 60 days. Then, follow it up with a real Out Patient program, and mandatory daily AA meetings for another 90 days. Unfortunately, it is very likely that the system, her parents, and her support staff will continue to fail her until it it too late. At which point, the eulogies will be written and the finger pointing shall commence.
Via con Dios, L2!

Sheriff Joe

This was e-mailed to me today.  Not sure if I agree with all of his tactics, but you have to admire the results.

SHERIFF JOE IS AT IT AGAIN!

You all remember Sheriff Joe Arpaio of Arizona , who painted the jail cells pink and made the inmates wear pink prison garb.  Well . . .

SHERIFF JOE is at it AGAIN!

Maricopa County was spending approximately $18 million a year on stray animals, like cats and dogs. Sheriff Joe offered to take the department over, and the County Supervisors approved.

The animal shelters are now all staffed and operated by prisoners. They feed and care for the strays. Every animal in his care is taken out and walked twice daily. He now has prisoners who are experts in animal nutrition and behavior. They give great classes for anyone who would like to adopt an animal. He has literally taken stray dogs off the street, given them to the care of prisoners, and had them place in dog shows.

The best part? His budget for the entire department is now under $3 million. Teresa and I adopted a Weimaraner from a Maricopa County shelter two years ago. He was neutered, and current on all shots, in great health, and even had a microchip inserted the day we got him. Cost us $78..

The prisoners get the benefit of about $0.28 an hour for working, but most would work for free, just to be out of their cells for the day. Most of his budget is for utilities, building maintenance, etc. He pays the prisoners out of the fees collected for adopted animals.

I have long wondered when the rest of the country would take a look at the way he runs his jail system, and copy some of his ideas. He has a huge farm, donated to the county years ago, where inmates can work, and they grow most of their own fresh vegetables and food, doing all the work and harvesting by hand.

He has a pretty good-sized hog farm, which provides meat, and fertilizer. It fertilizes the Christmas tree nursery, where prisoners work, and you can buy a living Christmas tree for $6-$8 for the Holidays, and plant it later. We have six trees in our yard from the Prison.

Yup, he was re-elected last year with 83% of the vote. Now he’s in trouble with the ACLU again. He painted all his buses and vehicles with a mural, that has a special hotline phone number painted on it, where you can call and report suspected illegal aliens. Immigrations and Customs Enforcement wasn’t doing enough in his eyes, so he had 40 deputies trained specifically for enforcing immigration laws, started up his hotline, and bought four new buses just for hauling folks back to the border. He’s kind of a ‘Git-R Dun’ kind of Sheriff.

TO THOSE OF YOU NOT FAMILIAR WITH JOE ARPAIO: HE IS THE MARICOPA COUNTY , ARIZONA SHERIFF AND HE KEEPS GETTING ELECTED OVER AND OVER. THIS IS ONE OF THE REASONS WHY:

Sheriff Joe Arpaio (in Arizona ), who created the ‘Tent City Jail,’ has jail meals down to 40 cents a serving and charges the inmates for them.

He stopped smoking and porno magazines in the jails, took away their weights, and cut off all but ‘G’ movies.

He started chain gangs so the inmates could do free work on county and city projects.

Then He Started Chain Gangs For Women So He Wouldn’t Get Sued For Discrimination.

He took away cable TV Until he found out there was A Federal Court Order that Required Cable TV For Jails. So He Hooked Up The Cable TV Again Only Let In The Disney Channel And The Weather Channel.

When asked why the weather channel, He Replied ‘So They Will Know How Hot It’s Gonna Be While They Are Working

On My Chain Gangs.’

He Cut Off Coffee Since It Has Zero Nutritional Value.

When the inmates complained, he told them, ‘This Isn’t The Ritz-Carlton . . . If You Don’t Like It, Don’t Come Back.’

More On The Arizona Sheriff:

With Temperatures Being Even Hotter Than Usual In Phoenix (116 Degrees Just Set A New Record), the Associated Press Reports: About 2,000 Inmates Living In A Barbed-Wire-Surrounded Tent Encampment At The Maricopa County Jail Have Been Given Permission To Strip Down To Their Government-Issued Pink Boxer Shorts.

On Wednesday, hundreds of men wearing boxers were either curled up on their bunk beds or chatted in the tents, which reached 138 Degrees Inside The Week Before.

Many Were Also Swathed In Wet, Pink Towels As Sweat Collected On Their Chests And Dripped Down To Their PINK SOCKS.

‘It Feels Like We Are In A Furnace,’ Said James Zanzot, An Inmate Who Has Lived In The TENTS for 1 year. ‘It’s Inhumane.’

Joe Arpaio, the tough-guy sheriff who created the tent city and long ago started making his prisoners wear pink, and eat bologna sandwiches, is not one bit sympathetic. He said Wednesday that he told all of the inmates: ‘It’s 120 Degrees In Iraq And Our Soldiers Are Living In Tents Too, And They Have To Wear Full Battle Gear, But They Didn’t Commit Any Crimes,So Shut Your Mouths!’

Way To Go, Sheriff!

Maybe if all prisons were like this one there would be a lot less crime and/or repeat offenders. Criminals should be punished for their crimes–not live in luxury until it’s time for their parole, only to go out and commit another crime so they can get back in to live on taxpayers money and enjoy things some citizens cannot afford to have for themselves.

If you agree, pass this on. If not, just delete it.